23 Reasons Why You Should Not Be Wasting Time on Fun Fridays:

1. What do you call a joke that isn’t funny? A sentence.
2. Back in 1980, I fell off my bike, twisted my foot, and hurt my knee. I’m telling you this now because there was no social media in the ’80s.
3. What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing; they fast.
4. I was shocked when I found out my toaster wasn’t waterproof.
5. Who shaves at least 20 times a day? A barber.
6. I broke my finger last week. On the other hand, I’m okay.
7. Learn sign language. It’s very handy.
8. Knock, knock. Come in!
9. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall … and a pretty good spring and summer too.
10. How do you know you’re a true ’90s kid? When you look at your birth certificate and it says you were born between 1990 and 1999.
11. Do you know what’s odd? Every other number.
12. Mary had a little lamb. The doctor fainted.
13. My friend says to me, “What rhymes with orange?” And I told him, “No it doesn’t!”
14. Did you hear about the circus fire? It was in tents.
15. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
16. I told my friend she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
17. How many apples grow on a tree? All of them.
18. Never trust an atom. They make up everything.
19. What do you call a pigeon that can’t find its way back home? A pigeon.
20. Roses are dead. Violets are dead. I am a bad gardener.
21. What do you call a pencil sharpener that can’t sharpen pencils? Broken.
22. What do you call a talking turtle? Fictional.
23. What does one French guy say to another French guy? My name is also Guy.