Guest post by Jennifer Sienes
Jennifer Sienes, one of Karen’s clients, is a talented fiction writer who according to editors has a gift for bringing out the emotional power of the scene. She was recently named as a finalist in the 2014 Genesis contest with her novel Redemption.
You can find out more and read her blog at www.jennifersienes.com
I’ve been reading the Steve Laube Agency blog for years—long before Karen Ball signed me as a client. It’s where I receive advice, encouragement and the tools to better my craft. So, I’m well aware this is a blog for writers, but I hope you’ll allow me the leeway to speak to a larger audience here—those who live with a writer—spouses, this means you.
I attended my first writer’s conference in 2008, and Debbie Macomber was the keynote speaker. The title of her talk was How to Become an Overnight Success in Twenty Years. This was impactful on many levels. Her words not only gave me encouragement and took some of the pressure off—I thought I’d be on my way in a year—but when I shared it with my husband, Chris, he understood the time and commitment it would take to follow God’s call.
In response, he became my greatest writer’s tool.
At this point, he’d already encouraged me to leave a teaching career to give writing a fair chance. I realize this is not an option for some, but I was blessed with a husband who believes my writing is a ministry—one in which the payout may not be financial. Okay, let’s get real, most of us don’t write for the money. But if we’re in God’s will, the blessings far outweigh monetary compensation.
But Chris’s support goes far beyond the financial. It’s the day-to-day things that matter—understanding how imperative it is that I adhere to a regular writing schedule and not get sidetracked with those pesky tasks, such as yard work and house cleaning. As long I stay on top of the dust bunnies, it’s all good.
When I struggle to find the perfect words to write a blog or flesh out a scene, he makes suggestions—not always helpful, but the intent is pure, and I love that about him. As a chiropractor with a busy practice, he hands out more of my business cards than I do. A patient curious about what I do, he sends them to my website. Someone in need of a spiritual pick-me-up, he suggests my blogs.
And then there are the story ideas he throws my way. I have to admit, this isn’t his forte. I write contemporary women’s fiction and his favorite author is Louis L’Amour—which I can attest to by the hundred-plus paperbacks with which he can’t bear to part, like a kid’s baseball-card collection. More often than not, his characters stem from old westerns, or, heaven forbid, a James Bond movie.
And yet, he comes home each night after ten-plus hours at work, eager for me to read what I’ve written. This benefits me in several ways: When I read out loud, my ears often find mistakes my eyes don’t catch; he questions anything that doesn’t make sense (“Did I already know that character, or are you just introducing him?”) which reminds me not everything in my head actually made it into that draft; and I get his pulse on whether the story works. Granted, he isn’t my toughest editor, but it’s not his writing expertise I need—I have a critique partner for that. Instead, I look to him for encouragement.
Writing, in so many ways, is a solitary profession. Many of our friends and family members don’t get what we do. I’m sure, if they could read my mind, they’d swear I have a form of schizophrenia—all those people living inside my head. And I’m okay with that. As long as my husband understands, encourages and supports me, I can persevere through the endless hours of sitting, the tedious work of rewrites and the times of disappointment and failure.
Because, in the end, my successes will be all the sweeter for having shared them with him.
God’s Map
Hi Jennifer,
Congratulations on being a finalist in the Genesis.
I love reading how supportive your husband is. Quitting my day job is not an option, but my husband is supportive of my writing. This coming weekend is my first weekend off in three weeks. He is devoting his weekend to yard work, and I’m going to focus on writing and only writing. (Maybe laundry.) The other night I mentioned to him in passing that I didn’t make it as a finalist in the Genesis. The next morning he wrote me a note of encouragement. I appreciate his understanding and support.
Thanks so much for sharing your story.
Thanks for sharing, Jennifer. A spouse who is not only understanding, but helpful, takes a huge load off our already difficult trek. While I can’t quit the day job, I do get home and plop myself at my writing desk for another 2 or 3 hours per night, leaving my wife on her own (she goes to her fortress of quilting, so it works out). But she’s watched me for over ten years now. She’s seen the rejections, the frustration, several resignations from my writing career, and has always been my biggest supporter. And she has an eye for misspellings and typos.
Leave the Louis L’Amour collection alone. The Sackett clan got me through three WESTPAC cruises during my tie in the Navy.
Jennifer,
What a great post, Jennifer. It brought me a quick reminder of the champion and cheerleader my husband is. He has carried my books, literally, since we met in high school at age 17, and he’s still doing it today. The only difference is that now my name’s on the cover!
As is true for you and your hubs, Ron is my first reader, my kindest critic, and my work always benefits from his insight and thoughtful feedback. We are embarking on a new venture – we are writing a book together. It’s on marital conflict. So pray for us please! It’s a very different experience for us and if our marriage survives it (funny, given the topic), I’ll know that the 39 years we’ve invested in one another have truly paid off!
Congrats on the Genesis nod. Great accomplishment.
Yes! Yes! I just sent your blog to my husband and added my big thank you to him for being so supportive of my writing. Thank you for reminding me how blessed I am.
I see I’m not the only one with a husband who is her biggest fan! It’s such a blessing to have, and you’ve reminded me to thank him (again) for all the time he’s taken to read and critique my work. If your spouse is like mine, however, the only downside to this is that he or she is likely overly biased toward thinking what your work is great (my husband always rates my work as A+, even when I know that it isn’t). That being said, I thank God for the bond of marriage that enables both of us to be more than we could be on our own.
Jennifer, thank you for sharing your experience about this. I appreciate the way you have brought to light something that so often gets taken for granted. Some of our best and truest support comes from those who are not a writers. The anchor that those relationships provide help maintain a hold in the broader world for which we write to begin with. Blessings to you, and hearty congratulations for the Genesis recognition. 🙂
What a lovely gift Chris is to you, Jennifer. Thanks for the reminder of how our sovereign God puts people in our lives to bolster us, encourage us, and walk with us in this journey.
Blessings to you and congrats on Genesis!
You are a fortunate woman to have such a supportive husband, Jennifer. When I shared my dream about writing with my husband, he encouraged me to do it! I’ve said no to a number of activities so that I can scrounge more time for writing. He’s been such a support and encourager as I walk this journey. When we watch movies, he is at the point where he analyzes it with me. He challenges me to think through aspects of my stories to make sure they are the best they can be.
Having an encourager on this journey makes each step lighter, doesn’t it?
What a blessing to read your responses, and to be a part of your writing journeys with your spouses at the helm. I know I couldn’t do it without Chris’s support and encouragement. Thanks for the congrats on the Genesis nod. And I promise to hang onto Chris’s Louis L’Amour books–especially the Sackett series is in hard back .
Thanks for sharing your story. My husband is my best supporter too. We are blessed.