First, let me point out how much I appreciate the respect shown by the commenters on my last blog post, “The Difference We Offer.” I appreciate the healthy dialogue and always look forward to reading comments on my posts.
If only everyone could be so open-minded and cordial! One of our family stories is about a relative turning up her nose at a sushi plate, declaring, “I don’t like sushi.”
“Have you ever tried it?”
“No.” Her chuckle sounded both sheepish and unpleasant. As far as we know, she still hasn’t tried sushi.
How do you know you don’t like anything you’ve never tried? Some may not like raw seafood, but much sushi is cooked. Other types are fashioned only from vegetables. Unless you have an allergy, eliminating an entire food category without tasting it doesn’t make sense.
The same can be said of bibliophiles who disparage or refuse to read specific categories of books. Declaring, “I hate all Western novels,” or “I despise all biographies,” without exploring any titles isn’t a good look. Besides, a reader can try ten novels but not gain respect and love for a genre until trying book #11. You may need only to find the plot/author/writing combination that appeals to you.
Because romance novelists are fantastic people, some readers feel they can poke fun, no matter how many copies are sold. Many mockers haven’t read the first book in the genre, yet they enjoy disparaging romance authors.
Holding a negative opinion about a book or a genre is okay. But if you feel you must share your opinion, be tender. When I was still writing books, I went to a conference that focused on nonfiction. The directors kindly allowed authors to display and sell their books. I was happy with my table of romance novels. Then, an old woman told me, “Those are fantasies.”
Since I was young, unprepared for such a harsh assessment, and stupid at the time, I replied, “No, they’re not! I have a wonderful husband. I stay home with my children.”
“It’s nice to have a cash cow.” She moved away before I had a chance to respond.
Cash cow? I’ve never thought of my husband as a cash cow and never will. Her remark said much more about her than it ever could about me. We can only pray for such bitter people
Soon after, I heard a similar opinion from a friend, expressed in an entirely different manner. “It’s hard for me to read romance novels because my marriage has been difficult and not romantic at all.” Her insight made me feel compassion for her and not upset by her opinion as a reader. What a difference!
As a reader, please remember:
1. Attacking authors is not the right way to vent your anger with life.
2. You will not like every book you read.
3. Publishing is challenging. Writers don’t need unsolicited negative opinions.
4. If an author asks your opinion and it’s negative, be truthful, but helpful and specific.
5. Point out at least one good aspect of the book; or say, “I’m grateful you write for the Lord.”
6. Never resort to personal insults.
7. Praise is always appreciated.
May you enjoy the book you are reading today!
