16 writing puns and jokes.

I claim no originality nor responsibility. It’s not my fault!
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I’m a big fan of punctuation—period.

I tried writing a story about flying, but it didn’t take off.

Writing is the only write way to express myself.

The manuscript was too long, so I had to cut to the chase.

Why do writers always feel cold? Because they’re surrounded by drafts!

What do writers have for breakfast? Synonym buns!

I know a writer who has a fondness for culinary metaphors. His stories were always well-seasoned.

Why did the editor go to jail? Because he was caught in a sentence.

Why did the pencil break up with the pen? It couldn’t handle the pressure.

My wife asked me to bring her something hard to write on. I don’t know why she got so mad at me. It’s pretty hard to write on sand.

Why do writers fail to eat regularly? Because they are always full of ideas.

Why did the author become a gardener? Because she had a plot to tend to.

What did the writer who was told they have no platform do? Buy much, much higher shoes.

The teacher said, “Name two pronouns,” looking pointedly at Steve. He looked up and said, “Who, me?”

What do you get when you cross a writer with a deadline? A really clean house.

What do cats and commas have in common? Cats have claws at the end of their paws and commas are a pause at the end of a clause.