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The Steve Laube Agency

The Steve Laube Agency

Helping to Change the World Word by Word

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Home » Critique

Critique

Criticism – What Are They Really Saying?

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon February 25, 2016
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Any time you send a book – or even an article – into the world, you subject yourself to both praise and criticism. Sometimes praise seems embarrassing but criticism can hurt. By criticism, I’m not referring to the helpful, constructive kind. I’m talking about the mean kind.

When someone says something hostile, consider that it’s not about you. That person is expressing what matters to her. The subject of the remark will reflect what the person is worried about, or jealous of.

Accomplishment

Does the comment diminish your accomplishment in some way? Perhaps the person disparages the type of book you write, or your publisher, or the fact it’s self-published. If your success makes someone feel dreadful, it’s not your fault. That person’s feeling the rise of jealousy because of his own regrets and missteps. Most people would love to have all the benefits of being an author (or name any profession) without doing the work. Once someone reveals this proclivity, write him off as someone you should avoid sharing your good news with.

Honesty?

Perhaps the person makes a scathing remark, and then slaps you by saying she’s just being honest. If she doesn’t find anything good to say, and especially if this person seems rarely to be on your side, this “honesty” is meanness, and she’s blocking any defense or she’ll upbraid you for not being able to deal with an “honest” comment. This is a ploy of the toxic person.

Advice

Maya Angelou is quoted as saying, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”

It’s painful to realize that someone who you thought was, or should be, on your team, rooting for you to be successful, isn’t. This can be anyone from a family member, pastor, or a “friend” who enjoys your misery but doesn’t rejoice in your success. Don’t keep going back to the well, looking for them to change their minds and start supporting you. Don’t make even a small part of why you are writing all about “showing” them. You never will.

Instead, limit the time you spend with naysayers as much as you can.

Gravitate to people who genuinely support you. They’re there, wanting to hear all about your celebrations. Relish spending time with your team. They are the people who matter.

Your turn

What is your favorite way to celebrate publishing success?

What is the best piece of advice or encouragement you’ve heard on your publishing journey?

Have you encountered jealous people? What did you do?

Leave a Comment
Category: CareerTag: bad reviews, Criticism, Critique

Meaningful Feedback

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon June 20, 2013
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Picture made entirely of words by Ann Murray

My family recently attended an annual one-man art exhibition by my uncle, Eldridge Bagley, at the Glave Kocen Gallery in Richmond, Virginia.

Because my daughter, Ann, enjoys photography, I encouraged her to ask the gallery director his opinion of her work. He liked several of her photos,and guided her on which types of images would sell in …

Read moreMeaningful Feedback
Category: Art, Communication, TamelaTag: Critique, Get Published

Proper Care and Feeding of …You!

By Karen Ballon December 12, 2012
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Thanks so much for all your thoughtful responses last week. I gained a great deal from reading and pondering them. This week, I’d like to take a look from the other side of the desk. As an author myself, I know how hard the writing gig is. And I know a LOT of authors, published and not, who have hit speed-bumps -or even felt like the Editor/Publisher/Agent semi just flattened them in the middle of …

Read moreProper Care and Feeding of …You!
Category: Agents, Book Business, Career, Craft, Karen, Writing CraftTag: Critique, help, Writers

“The Great Unspoken” – Why Agents Don’t Critique

By Karen Ballon December 5, 2012
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There’s a secret agents and editors share. Something they seldom discuss with each other, and never with writers. It’s something they dislike. Intensely. It ties their hands when it comes to guiding writers guidance. It’s the #1 reason they turn down proposals, and the #2 (and sometimes #1) reason they’ve gone with form rejection letters. It’s something many inexperienced agents and editors try to …

Read more“The Great Unspoken” – Why Agents Don’t Critique
Category: Book Proposals, Craft, Get Published, Karen, Writing CraftTag: book proposals, Critique, Rejection

Finding the Right Critique Partner

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon April 12, 2012
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by Tamela Hancock Murray Recently I talked with a supervisor in a field unrelated to the publishing industry, who mentioned an employee. “I shudder to think of the advice he’s giving out. He has a general understanding of the subject matter, but not the skill set.” It struck me how applicable this statement can be regarding people who offer to critique manuscripts. In a previous …

Read moreFinding the Right Critique Partner
Category: Craft, Creativity, Get Published, Tamela, Writing CraftTag: Critique, Get Published, Writing Craft

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