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The Steve Laube Agency

Helping to Change the World…Word by Word

The Steve Laube Agency

The Steve Laube Agency

Helping to Change the World Word by Word

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Home » Pitching

Pitching

12 Ways to Annoy a Literary Agent

By Steve Laubeon February 6, 2023
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This article is written in jest, but with decades of truth behind it.

No, we agents are not infallible and aren’t always right. We try not to sound arrogant or snooty. We genuinely would like to see you succeed, whether we are your agent or not! Our hope is you learn from what others have done or done incorrectly.

Drum roll please:

1. Call a week after sending your proposal to ask what we think of it.

2. Include glitter in your envelope if you’ve sent a printed copy of your proposal to my office.

3. Send a bribe (I mean “gift”) as part of the proposal. (I’ve received cash, signed memorabilia of famous people, framed artwork, and more.)

4. Respond to my rejection letter with vile and offensive language in return. (And I’m talking about the worst of the worst.)

5. Address the communication with my name misspelled. And then continue the error throughout your correspondence.

6. Address the communication to someone who doesn’t work here. (Happened last week.)

7. Start your pitch with “I know you don’t do books like this, but you will want to make an exception with mine.”

8. At a writers conference, use the restroom as your place to pitch your idea.

9. Ask that I click on a link in your email to access your proposal file. (We know better than to click malware links.)

10. Fail to follow the agency guidelines; but, instead, send a generic pitch to every agent in the universe and include them all in the cc line of your email.

11. The body of your email says “Here it is.” No signature line, no information in the email at all. Or, even worse, the body of the email is blank. (This happens multiple times a month.)

12. Send your proposal to all four of us at the agency simultaneously, and don’t tell us. We do tend to talk to one another.

Fortunately, most writers do not do these things. They stand out for a reason. Instead, strive to be professional and respectful.

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Category: Agency, Agents, Book Proposals, Conferences, Pitch, Pitching, The Writing Life

What’s the Deal With One-Sheets?  

By Dan Balowon November 17, 2022
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I believe it is safe to say almost every book is purchased before it is read. Or, at the very least, the decision to read it is made before it is read. Wow, we are mining the depths of Dan’s publishing wisdom today. There’s a reason aspiring and even experienced authors are encouraged to create a one-page pitch sheet for their books. If you can’t explain your work in relatively few words, you need …

Read moreWhat’s the Deal With One-Sheets?  
Category: Book Proposals, Pitching

10 Reasons Bob Doesn’t “Close” Submissions

By Bob Hostetleron September 1, 2022
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Some literary agents “close” submissions periodically. That is, they announce that they won’t accept or respond to “over-the-transom” queries or proposals for a set period (usually a month or two, sometimes a quarter). For you young whippersnappers who don’t know what “over-the-transom” (or “whippersnapper”) means, it’s a throwback to the days before air conditioning, when offices were vented and …

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Category: Book Proposals, Pitching, The Publishing Life

7 Tips for Pitching Your Idea

By Steve Laubeon August 29, 2022
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You have a chance to pitch your book idea to an editor or an agent at a conference. I’ve written about this before (see “That Conference Appointment”) but thought it may be helpful to come at the topic from a different direction. The pitch itself. These tips can help whether or not your appointment is virtual or in-person. 1. Relax. Seriously. Relax. This 15-minute appointment won’t make or break …

Read more7 Tips for Pitching Your Idea
Category: Book Proposals, Conferences, Pitching

Make the Right Media Choice

By Dan Balowon July 6, 2022
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The study of communication through various methods fascinates me. Some media share audiences with other media and others have very select audiences. Each person consumes content differently. Those in education know students do not all learn at the same speed using the same tools. Fortunately, good teachers recognize those differences and adjust their methods. In the 1970s and 80s, educator Neil …

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Category: Pitching

4 Ways to Lose Me Quickly

By Bob Hostetleron June 22, 2022
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As a literary agent, I review a lot of book pitches. A lot. And, not to belabor the point, but a lot. Despite the overwhelming volume of submissions demanding my attention, I try to give each one a fair shake. Sure, if the recipient field of your email has a hundred email addresses in it, it makes it easier for me to say, “No thanks.” But, while that may be the quickest way to disinterest me, it …

Read more4 Ways to Lose Me Quickly
Category: Book Proposals, Common Questoins, Pitching

Ode to the Hefty Book

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon March 3, 2022
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Readers who love long books might want to check out the classics. I’m catching up on the classics as I write this post, which may take some time. Currently, I’m reading An American Tragedy by Theodore Dreiser. Unfortunately, I could only get my hands on a mass-market, paperback size, which makes reading a book of that heft less pleasurable than it should be. The audiobook runs 34 hours and 12 …

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Category: Get Published, Pitch, Pitching, The Writing Life

No Need to Be Insulting

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon February 23, 2022
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Recently, my husband and I decided to sell his Lincoln sedan. The vehicle had been driven only a few miles and was barely out of warranty. The dealership always sent a valet to drive the 40-mile round trip for scheduled maintenance. Kept in a garage, the car had no ding or scratch; and the interior was spotless. Who wouldn’t want this fantastic car? I called up a local used-car dealership. They …

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Category: Pitching, Rejection

Watch the Jargon

By Dan Balowon February 17, 2022
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In early 2018, a corporate consulting firm, Grant Thornton, did a detailed analysis of Fortune 500 company websites, press releases, and social media. What they found was not surprising, but still proved how the use of business jargon (commonly used phrases) pervades the corporate world. What was the most commonly used phrase by Fortune 500 companies? “Best in class” Rounding out the top ten most …

Read moreWatch the Jargon
Category: Book Business, Book Proposals, Branding, Marketing, Pitch, Pitching, The Writing Life

Rendered Speechless

By Steve Laubeon November 15, 2021
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Those of you who have followed our blog are aware of the rather “interesting” proposals or pitches we receive. After so many years of doing this, it is almost hard to be surprised. Until a recent telephone exchange. Me: This is Steve Laube.Caller: How do I go about getting an idea to your company?Me: Have you looked at our website? It’s all laid out there for anyone to …

Read moreRendered Speechless
Category: Pitching
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