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The Steve Laube Agency

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The Steve Laube Agency

The Steve Laube Agency

Helping to Change the World Word by Word

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Home » Rejection

Rejection

Tossed by the Ocean of Emotion

By Steve Laubeon September 15, 2025
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It is hard to be a writer or to work in the publishing industry. Everyone defines success differently, and we strive to meet those expectations at every turn.

Often we let “success” define us, especially when a writer is told, “You are only as good as the sales of your last book.” Or an agent is told, “You are only worth the value of your last contract.”

Henri Nouwen, in his book The Return of the Prodigal Son, said it best:

Many of my daily preoccupations suggest that I belong more to the world than to God. A little criticism makes me angry, and a little rejection makes me depressed. A little praise raises my spirits, and a little success excites me. It takes very little to raise me up or thrust me down. Often I am like a small boat on the ocean, completely at the mercy of its waves. All the time and energy I spend in keeping some kind of balance and preventing myself from being tipped over and drowning shows that my life is mostly a struggle for survival: not a holy struggle, but an anxious struggle resulting from the mistaken idea that it is the world that defines me.

To practice a better way is so hard. We are in that boat being tossed by the waves of emotion. It doesn’t help when publishing experts say, “Work harder.” Or “Write faster.” Or “This is the right way.” And another says, “That is the right way.” What are we to do?

Examine Your Beginnings

Think about why you became a writer in the first place. Go back to those roots. What was it that inspired you? The answer is rarely fame or fortune.

Examine Your Motives

What is it that inspires you now? This cuts to the core of why you are doing what you are doing.

Locate Your Anchor

The boat metaphor is appropriate here. If you are being pushed toward the rocks, find that anchor and secure your place in the water. When the anchor holds, it doesn’t matter what the world says, or what an editor says, or what an agent says. “We have this as a sure and steadfast anchor of the soul, a hope that enters into the inner place behind the curtain, where Jesus has gone as a forerunner on our behalf, having become a high priest forever” (Hebrews 6:19-20, ESV).

Therefore, the next time you get the dreaded editing letter,

The one-star Amazon review,

A critical Facebook comment,

A rejection letter from a surly agent…

The next time, drop anchor and ride the emotion. It doesn’t mean you can’t cry a little or can’t get angry for a while; that would be inhuman. But once the storm has passed, you will find yourself still on your journey, following your original calling to write to the best of your abilities, come what may.

 

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Category: Career, Get Published, Rejection, The Writing LifeTag: Career, Get Published, Rejection

Why Does It Take Editors and Agents So Long to Read My Proposal?

By Steve Laubeon October 28, 2024
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Recently, a writer posted this question: I submitted a proposal to a publisher 6 months ago. The guidelines said that a response would be provided at the end of 4 months. At the end of 5 months I sent an email query to confirm that they had actually received the submission–still no response. Now I am at the end of 6 months.…Do I give up? I wish I had a magic wand to solve this problem for …

Read moreWhy Does It Take Editors and Agents So Long to Read My Proposal?
Category: Agency, Book Business, Book Proposals, Common QuestoinsTag: book proposals, Rejection

Unsolicited Proposals: Aka “The Slush Pile”

By Steve Laubeon July 1, 2024
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All literary agents receive dozens of proposals each week. Most are via email these days, but some still come via the post. Last week was a relatively slow week; my office received only 28 unsolicited proposals via email and two in the post. For the month of June, it was around 170 total unsolicited proposals received. (Unsolicited means proposals that are not from our existing clients. We get a …

Read moreUnsolicited Proposals: Aka “The Slush Pile”
Category: Agency, Book Proposals, Get Published, Rejection, SteveTag: Get Published, Pitching, Proposals, Rejection

Your Writers Conference Appointment

By Steve Laubeon April 8, 2024
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[I’ve posted variations of this article over the years. I hope that by bringing it back to the top of the pile, many of you new readers will see it!] __________ You snagged one of those valuable 15-minute appointments with an agent or an editor at a writers conference. Now what? What do you say? How do you say it? What do I bring with me? And what does that scowling person on the other side …

Read moreYour Writers Conference Appointment
Category: Book Business, Book Proposals, Conferences, Pitch, Pitching, Writing CraftTag: Book Business, Conferences, Get Published, Pitching, Proposals, Rejection

Writers Learn to Prepare

By Steve Laubeon December 4, 2023
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Preparation is awfully important if you are planning to climb Mt. Everest. If you show up in a T-shirt, shorts, and flip flops, with a sack lunch, it is likely you will perish during the ascent. The same idea applies to the writer. Preparation is one of the keys to success. There Are No Shortcuts Despite numerous methods for efficiency, there is still no shortcut in writing a great book. It is …

Read moreWriters Learn to Prepare
Category: Craft, Rejection, The Writing LifeTag: Creativity, Rejection, Writing Craft

Handling Disappointment

By Steve Laubeon June 19, 2023
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I do not like to experience disappointment. I do not like rejection, even when it isn’t my personal project being turned down. I do not like to be the bearer of bad news. And yet I do experience disappointment, rejection, and the telling of bad news–every week. That is the nature of the arts. The arts (meaning music, writing, dance, and painting) are comprised of thousands of hours of …

Read moreHandling Disappointment
Category: Encouragement, Faith, Get Published, Personal, Rejection, Theology, Writing CraftTag: disappointment, Encouragement, Faith, Rejection

Fun Fridays – May 26, 2023

By Steve Laubeon May 26, 2023
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When a picture says a thousand words:  

Read moreFun Fridays – May 26, 2023
Category: Fun Fridays, HumorTag: Rejection

Rejection: A Fact of the Writing Life

By Steve Laubeon August 15, 2022
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Rejection is a fact of life. Especially the writing life. As one crusty publishing veteran said: “Welcome to the industry that will break your heart.” Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy, doesn’t it? But let me put a little perspective on it. I admire writers. You put your souls on a few pages and send them to strangers and pray for acceptance. How do you do that, day in and day …

Read moreRejection: A Fact of the Writing Life
Category: RejectionTag: Get Published, Rejection

Responding to Criticism

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon June 18, 2020
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When someone tells me she’s not sure she wants me to read her manuscript, I know she’s not ready for publication. Such sentiment shows a lack of confidence and a fear of both rejection and criticism. Even though readers usually treat writers with respect, a critical word can puncture the heart.

Imagine the wounds delivered on Internet sites such as Amazon from readers who lack that respect. A …

Read moreResponding to Criticism
Category: Book Business, Career, Social Media, The Writing Life, Writing CraftTag: Book Business, Criticism, Rejection, Writing Craft

4 Things I Learned from Rejection

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon February 12, 2020
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Nobody likes to be rejected. Not middle-school dance attenders. Not job applicants. And definitely not writers. Unfortunately, however, rejection pretty much comes with the territory for writers—at least for writers who are brave enough to submit their work to agents or editors for publication. And it hurts. Every. Single. Time. Take it from me, I know. I’ve been rejected hundreds of times, and …

Read more4 Things I Learned from Rejection
Category: RejectionTag: Rejection, rejection letters
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