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The Steve Laube Agency

Helping to Change the World…Word by Word

The Steve Laube Agency

The Steve Laube Agency

Helping to Change the World Word by Word

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Home » Humor » Page 2

Humor

Mysteries of the English Language

By Bob Hostetleron August 3, 2022
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I love the English language. It’s been very good to me. But it can be a booger too. For example, you know that a slim chance and a fat chance are the same, right? And a wise man and a wise guy don’t mean the same thing?

It’s a crazy language. And those who must learn it as a second language face many strange twists and turns—as do those of us who try to speak and write with something resembling clarity and erudition. So, in the service of all humanity, I offer the following quick list of some of the mysteries of my native language:

10. If oranges are orange, why isn’t the color yellow called “banana?” Or bananas called “yellows?”

9. If writers write and painters paint, why don’t fingers fing? If teachers have taught, why haven’t preachers praught? Why don’t grocers groce?

8. If you throw out some odds and ends, but keep one item, is it an odd or an end?

7. Why is there no other word for “synonym?”

6. How can it be possible that the Oxford English Dictionary has 192 definitions for the word “set?”

5. How is it that your nose can run and your feet can smell?

4. How odd that is it the letters “ough” can be pronounced in eight different ways? (e.g., “A rough-coated, dough-faced ploughman strode through the streets of Scarborough, coughing and hiccoughing thoughtfully.”)

3. How can your house burn up while it’s burning down, forms are filled out by being filled in, and an alarm that’s gone off is still going on?

2. Why is “you’re a peach” a compliment but “you’re bananas” is an insult?

And, perhaps my favorite mystery of the English language:

1.  Why is the word “abbreviation” so long?

 

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Category: Humor, Language

A Writer’s Entrance Exam

By Bob Hostetleron March 17, 2022
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Say you wanted to enroll in studies at a respected educational institution—let’s call it Wisenheimer Academy for Clever Kids. You might expect to take an entrance exam to determine your degree of fitness for WACK, right? Just as you would to begin training for ministry, law enforcement, or interplanetary space travel. Oddly, though, there is no entrance exam for writers. Until now. That’s right. …

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Category: Humor, The Writing Life

Happy Valentine’s Day

By Steve Laubeon February 14, 2022
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Today is a fun day to celebrate that special someone in your life. My wife and I have been married for over 40 years now, and the video below is a tribute to her. No, she knows I do not and cannot dance; but videos like this make me feel like I can. Happy Valentine’s Day! Go-make someone-you-love-smile day.

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Category: Humor

21 Latin Phrases Every Writer Should Know

By Steve Laubeon February 11, 2022
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21 Latin Phrases Every Writer Should Know Persona Non Grata “An unwelcome person” (lately defined, by some, as a literary agent). Habeas Corpus “You have the body” (the legal right to appear before a judge). Cogito Ergo Sum “I think, therefore I am.” For a writer it would be “Scribo ergo sum.” Deus Ex Machina “God from the Machine.” In a novel it basically means the author has written something …

Read more21 Latin Phrases Every Writer Should Know
Category: Fun Fridays, HumorTag: Humor, Latin, Trivia

Singing the Slushpile Blues

By Steve Laubeon August 30, 2021
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by Steve Laube

The unsolicited pile of proposals in my office (aka "the slushpile) taunts me every day.

"Come over here!" it says, tantalizing me with immanent possibilities. I say to myself, "Maybe it will be the next one I look at. That will be 'The One.'"

I've been told that many of you enjoy hearing some of the offbeat letters or intriguing proposals I see. Here is a sampling from …

Read moreSinging the Slushpile Blues
Category: Book Proposals, Creativity, HumorTag: Humor, slushpile

O I C, U C?

By Bob Hostetleron May 20, 2021
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I’ve been a fan of James Taylor (he of “Fire and Rain” and “Carolina on My Mind” fame) since I first heard “Don’t Let Me Be Lonely Tonight” on the radio at a particularly lonely time in my life. That’s a story for another time; we won’t get into it right now. But from that day I bought or stole every album he ever released. On his 1979 release, Flag, he included a song titled “B.S.U.R. …

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Category: Humor, Inspiration

The Writing Life Compared

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon January 7, 2021
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As Soon as Your Book Is Published (Unpublished Author Edition) Your hair will become fuller, lusher, and shinier. You will only write a thousand words a day to make a million dollars a year. You’ll be a bestselling author, and every book will float to the top of the charts. You will be the most popular author at writers conferences. Aspiring authors will fawn over you, keen for your wisdom. You …

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Category: Humor, The Writing Life

Words I Can Spell but Mispronounce

By Bob Hostetleron December 16, 2020
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A couple years ago I was enjoying a small family reunion with my two older brothers. We were playing a card game, and for some reason I used the word chimera in the conversation. Unfortunately, I failed to take into consideration three things: I had (to my recollection) never heard the word spoken but had only read it. My brothers are both smarter than me. My brothers would never hesitate to …

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Category: Humor, Reading

10 Haughty Author Commandments That Agents Must Obey

By Steve Laubeon June 22, 2020
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Composed with tongue firmly in cheek. Send to yours and maketh your agent weepeth. 10 Haughty Author Commandments That Agents Must Obey I. Thou shalt have no other authors before me. II. Thou shalt adore all my ideas and declare them holy. III. Thou shalt personally guarantee my financial success. IV. Thou shalt send me to Bora Bora on my birthday and send a wad o’ cash at Christmas. V. Thou …

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Category: Agents, Humor

April Fool’s Jokes for Writers

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon April 1, 2020
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It may be too late by the time you read this post, but April Fool’s Day is a good time to mention some ideas for writers who like to prank others. In my early days of writing full-time, my son knew far more about computers than I did. (That hasn’t changed; he knows more about most things than I do.) So, one day before leaving for sixth grade, he did something. To this day, I don’t know exactly …

Read moreApril Fool’s Jokes for Writers
Category: Encouragement, Humor, The Writing Life
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