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Book Concepts That Will Never Sell

By Dan Balowon September 19, 2014

As a public service to our agency clients and the general Christian publishing industry (but mostly because it is a real drag being serious all the time) here are some book concepts that will never sell. Don’t even bother trying to develop them.

I Never Knew You: Depressing Bible Verses
The Dog that Returned to His Vomit: A Bible Story for All Ages
The Eglon Diet: The Purpose Driven Knife
Methodists are from Neptune, Presbyterians are from Jupiter
Right Behind: Biblical Proof of a Second Rapture
The Woman You Gave Me Made Me Eat It: Winning the Marital Blame Game
Bible Trash-Talk: Job gets lit up and other Bible passages where God had enough
Girls Like Sword-Drill Winners
Cheat Codes for Awana Games
Butch Butterman and His Friend, Mac the Friendly Ferret: Bible Stories from Weird People and Exotic Animals
God Wants You to Have Thick Hair
The Complete Book of Bible Complaints
The Complete Book of Bible “Begats”
90 Minutes in Muscatine, Iowa
The World Will End in 2012 (Special 2015 Update)
Completely Unaffected: Industries, Groups and Sports Teams who will not be affected by the Rapture
Ole Johnson’s Bible Recipes with Lefse
Lutefisk: The Devil’s Food
Plagiarism: And Other Secrets to Faster Sermon Preparation
The Weak-Willed Parent: Give Your Kids What They Want so they Don’t Embarrass You in the Supermarket
The Sharp-Dressed Usher
You’ve Got to Stop Your Evil Ways, Baby.
Cramming for Finals: Intense Bible Studies for people over 100.
Moan, Whimper and Complain Your Way To Happiness
Setting the Bar Low: Spiritual disciplines for Procrastinators and Underachievers
A Broken Clock is Right Twice A Day: Inspirations for the Pessimist
Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway: Tips on healthy Living for Fatalists

Finally, as a public service to novelists, a handy tool for coming up with concepts for your next award winning manuscript.

The Dan Balow Fiction Formulas:

The (insert noun) of (insert another noun)
(noun) of the (insert adjective and noun)
(adjective and noun) of the (noun)
(Christian word) of the (Christian word)
(color) (noun) of the (noun)
When (plural noun) see the (meteorological term)
The (number) (plural noun) of (geographic location)
The (something from Pottery Barn) of (name of Amish town)

And special mention to those of you who write for Enclave Publishing

(Italian name) marries a (animal type) from (name of planet)

Travel Woes? It Will be Okay!

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon September 18, 2014

As I prepare to attend the ACFW conference, I recall how many things can go wrong on travel. They can, and they do. But the world will not end. Please remember this. How do I know? Because I used to consider myself indispensable. But the graveyards are filled with indispensable people. And I must remember that the world will not end if something goes wrong. For example: 1.) I missed my flight. …

Category: Career, ConferencesTag: Career, Conferences, travel

Proposals: Make Comparison Titles Work for You

By Karen Ballon September 17, 2014

When I mention adding comp titles to a proposal, this is the response I often get from both nonfiction and fiction authors: “AARRRGGHH! Why? It’s so hard!” Well, there are two main reasons as to the why: Comp titles show there’s a market out there for books like yours. Comp titles help the editor/author “get” your book better. Now, that doesn’t mean you can just grab any book that’s similar …

Category: Book Proposals, Get PublishedTag: book proposals, Comparisons, Get Published

Long Live Napoleon Solo

By Dan Balowon September 16, 2014

The middle of September 1964 was one of the most historic periods in world history. Rarely has humanity seen the kind of cultural shift that occurred fifty years ago this month. Subsequent generations will never be the same. In one week, families, friends, fiends, fish and fun boat-rides changed forever, because fifty years ago this month, the following television programs premiered on U.S. …

Category: Craft, CreativityTag: Creativity, Writing Craft

How To Stumble Onto Your Brand…

By Guest Bloggeron September 15, 2014

Erin Taylor Young has a remarkable gift for making her readers laugh out loud even as she’s delivering hard truths about living a life of faith. Her down-to-earth writing style invites readers into the books that God has given her and sends them away refreshed and assured that we’re not in this gig alone. Her first humorous nonfiction, Surviving Henry: Adventures in Loving a Canine …

Category: Branding, Get Published, Guest Post, Humor, MarketingTag: Branding, Humor, Marketing

Novel Settings: City or Small Town?

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon September 11, 2014

Recently a faithful blog reader posted a question in response to my post on setting. She wondered why more Christian fiction isn’t set in large cities, and if there is a way to write the story to make a big city feel like a small town. Opportunity Versus Roots I grew up in a rural village. I have lived in apartments near D.C., and now I live in a mid-sized town. My comments are based on my …

Category: Craft, Get Published, Writing CraftTag: Craft, setting, Writing Craft

Proposals: Creating a Strong Hook

By Karen Ballon September 10, 2014

Last week we tackled the proposal synopsis. The cool thing about creating that aspect of the proposal first is that you can use it as the springboard for your hook: those few lines at the beginning of your proposal that draw an editor/agent deeper. (One note here: many writers have asked if they need to put something in the hook about genre. My vote: put the genre right after the title on the …

Category: Book Proposals, Get PublishedTag: book proposals, Get Published, Hook

Justin Beiber and Leisure Suits

By Dan Balowon September 9, 2014

Recognizing the difference between a cultural “trend” and a “phenomenon” is an important skill of anyone working in book publishing, both employees of publishers and authors. Why? Because book publishing in virtually every form does a very poor job responding to a phenomenon, which is generally short-lived. Often a phenomenon has come and gone before a book can be written and published on the …

Category: Book Business, Branding, Creativity, Marketing, The Publishing Life, TrendsTag: Book Business, The Publishing Life

Fun Fridays – Sept. 5, 2014

By Steve Laubeon September 5, 2014

What an amazing invention! I love the battery life and the ability to scan through the content quickly. Even better? I don’t have to rely on Amazon to deliver it by drone.

Category: Fun Fridays

Setting Your Setting

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon September 4, 2014

Avid readers know that some stories seem to rely more on setting than others. Sometimes, the setting is so prominent it feels like a character. In other books, the setting is a bare-bones backdrop to the story. But no matter how subtle, the setting has more impact on your story than you may realize because it’s where your characters live. They must act within it and react to it regardless. …

Category: Craft, Writing CraftTag: Craft, setting, Writing Craft