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Home » Book Proposals » Page 17

Book Proposals

How NOT to Get an Agent

By Bob Hostetleron February 14, 2018
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It’s a classic writer’s conference anecdote—even funnier because it is true. It didn’t happen to me, but to a friend of mine, who was not only followed into the restroom at a writer’s conference by an avid aspiring writer but was also slipped a book proposal. While in a stall. Free reading material, don’t you know.

That’s no way to pitch a book or get an agent. And, though I don’t have nearly the battle scars that my Steve Laube Agency colleagues do, I can draw a few lessons from my experience as a literary agent. So here are seven ways NOT to get an agent:

  1. Don’t follow instructions

I’ve blogged before (here) about aspiring writers who don’t take the time and effort to read and follow the guidelines for submission offered by agents. It never ceases to amaze me. For example, the Steve Laube Agency guidelines clearly state, “do not paste the proposal into the body of your e-mail.” So, of course, one fellow pasted his 11,000-word book proposal into the email message field, a decision that actually made my job a wee bit easier because I was able to say “no, thank you” almost instantly.

  1. Don’t put your best foot forward

The first line of one email I received allowed, “I realize it needs some work but I’m not usually one to write.” Well, okay, then. I’m not usually one to acquire clients who aren’t much given to writing.

Another email admitted that “I am a mediocre wordsmith” and “I am a terrible self-promoter,” followed by the statement, “I believe that my strengths and weaknesses in the publishing world are well-matched to what I know about you.” I don’t think I was supposed to be insulted, but it was a close call. Interestingly, I have since learned that this person is a capable writer of considerable promise—who obviously needs to learn how to put her best foot forward.

  1. Don’t choose your words wisely

I kid you not, one writer sent me a proposal (for a Christian book, mind you) that began, “The sh—in this book is heavy.” The proposal went on to use more and worse profanity, which is not a strong selling point for most Christian publishers.

  1. Don’t lead with your best stuff.

Yet another proposal pasted into the email message field—this one running 10,600 words—began with a variation on Edward Bulwer-Lytton’s immortal opening line. Bulwer-Lytton is famous for beginning his 1830 novel Paul Clifford with the words, “It was a dark and stormy night,” a sentence that has spawned the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, a tongue-in-cheek competition to compose the worst opening sentence to a bad novel. My correspondent started his novel more succinctly: “It was dark.”

  1. Ignore genre and word counts

 I don’t represent fantasy or science fiction, but I never said I didn’t want submissions for “superhero novels.” So far I have only received one such submission, but it was for “a mixture of normal superhero stories” that was also “very violent, vulgar, [and] has many brutal killing scenes.” Again, not a strong selling point with most Christian publishers. But it was the word count that still makes me chuckle: 1,048,849 words. That’s million. With an M.

  1. Lose touch with reality

I review only full book proposals, not queries or manuscripts. But I’m so glad I kept reading to the fourth paragraph of one emailed fiction query, because otherwise I would have missed this spectacular line: “The three books comparing to this novel are ‘Oliver Twist,’ ‘Don Quixote,’ and ‘Crime and Punishment.’”

  1. Don’t think things through before committing them to paper

It does take a lot of thought and effort to compose a book proposal, let alone write a complete book manuscript. Nonetheless, one writer found it advisable to include a line in his proposal that makes me laugh out loud every time I read it. I find it so rich a source of enjoyment, that I leave it with you, until my next blog post: “I can’t explain why I wrote this book.”

 

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Category: Agents, Book Proposals, Get PublishedTag: Agents, book proposals, Get Published

Can Death Cleaning Spark Joy?

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon February 8, 2018
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One of the most challenging aspects of being successful in nonfiction is choosing a topic general enough to interest a broad swath of readers, but unique enough to make them think of the question in a new way so they’ll want to buy your book. Take decluttering. I follow at least three decluttering blogs. My daughter says, “How about just cleaning instead of reading about it? Then you’d get it …

Read moreCan Death Cleaning Spark Joy?
Category: Book Proposals, Branding, Marketing, Pitching, Platform, The Writing LifeTag: Marketing, Nonfiction

Once in a Blue Moon Publishing

By Steve Laubeon February 5, 2018
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Someone called the other day and asked, “If I’ve self-published my book and want you to consider it for representation, should I even bother sending it? Or am I toast?” I answered, “It depends.” [For you regular readers, do you think that should become the motto of the Agency?] The question suggests it is an either/or proposition…determined by a set of rules that cannot be broken. The reality is …

Read moreOnce in a Blue Moon Publishing
Category: Book Proposals, The Publishing Life, The Writing LifeTag: Independent Publishing, Movie rights, Traditional Publishing

Timing Myths Dispelled

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon February 1, 2018
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Sometimes I receive submissions with the note, “I want to get this to the editor before fill in the name of the big conference, or before the holiday, or whatever! Does this make sense? I can answer this question right now. The perfect time to submit a manuscript is… Thursday, 4:45 AM local time, in Guam. Seriously, I understand the desire to enhance a submission’s chances by timing it when the …

Read moreTiming Myths Dispelled
Category: Book Proposals, The Writing LifeTag: book proposals, Submissions

I Can’t Believe I Wrote the Whole Thing

By Tamela Hancock Murrayon January 25, 2018
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You’re an author with lots of talent and a great idea! You know the market and are confident your story will work. There’s plenty of plot to make word count. So why not sell on proposal? Selling on proposal seems ideal, but might not be a good idea for the new author. Why not? Pacing A new author can’t necessarily gauge how long it will take to write a book. Perhaps the first book rode like the …

Read moreI Can’t Believe I Wrote the Whole Thing
Category: Book Proposals, Craft, Creativity, The Writing LifeTag: book proposals, The Writing Life, Writing Craft

Are You Curating or Creating?

By Dan Balowon January 23, 2018
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Every once in a while, a book proposal crosses my desk and catches my attention with its creativity and approach. It is engaging and makes me think.  Whether I agreed to work with the author or not, I needed to give them kudos for their great work. Rarely, if ever, does something catch my attention (in a good way) which is simply assembled from or built entirely on the thinking of someone else. I …

Read moreAre You Curating or Creating?
Category: Book Proposals, Craft, The Writing Life, Writing CraftTag: book proposals, Creativity, Nonfiction

How Do You Count Lifetime Book Sales?

By Steve Laubeon January 22, 2018
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A key element in a book proposal is your sales history. Of course, you can ignore this if you’ve never published a book before. But if you have published, either with a traditional publisher or independently, your sales history must be included in your next book proposal. Here is an example: Sales History: The Bestest Book Ever (XYZ Publishers, 1996) – 12,449 sold The Other Bestest Book I Wrote …

Read moreHow Do You Count Lifetime Book Sales?
Category: Book Proposals, Book Sales, Get Published, MarketingTag: book proposals, Book Sales, Independent Publishing, Traditional Publishing

Fix These 16 Potholes on Grammar Street

By Bob Hostetleron January 17, 2018
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Don’t worry. I hated grade school grammar as much as the next guy. Still, as a magazine editor and, later, as a freelance book editor and (now) literary agent, I have come across far too many grammatical and usage mistakes in writing submitted to me. Not all of us can be Strunk or White (though every writer should own their valuable book, The Elements of Style). But we can profit from a little …

Read moreFix These 16 Potholes on Grammar Street
Category: Book Proposals, Craft, Writing CraftTag: Grammar, Writing Craft

The Twelve Statements Before Christmas

By Dan Balowon December 19, 2017
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I pondered whether I should write this post in verse to the tune of The Twelve Days of Christmas, but since there would be a lot of copy/paste activity involved, I didn’t feel like readers would get their money’s worth. Instead, I’ll do this in simple list form, focusing on twelve statements from 2017, which left me speechless. And if you knew me personally, you would know there are very few …

Read moreThe Twelve Statements Before Christmas
Category: Book Proposals, HumorTag: book proposals, Christmas, Humor, Pitching

All I Want for Christmas is a Strong Endorsement

By Bob Hostetleron December 13, 2017
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I often tell developing writers that it is never too early to get a strong endorsement for your book project. In fact, I have included endorsements in book proposals—both my own and clients’ proposals.  Every little bit helps, don’t you know. Invariably, when I start talking about endorsements, a flurry of questions comes. In fact, a writer friend (of long and wide experience in publishing) …

Read moreAll I Want for Christmas is a Strong Endorsement
Category: Book Proposals, MarketingTag: book proposals, Endorsements, Marketing
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